Running is hard...

This week I started my "Couch to 5k" training and it is really hard. I mean, I know I'm out of shape but I just never expected it would be this hard. Beyond it being completely embarrassing that I can barely jog for 45 seconds before I have to walk, it is just sad. Sad that I let myself get so out of shape and sad that I have made it even more difficult for myself to get healthy. Yesterday during my "run" I had a little meltdown. Okay, I will be honest, a big meltdown. Poor Jared had to deal with a chick crying in the middle of our "run". Awesome, right? I know. So after I pulled myself together (kind of) we finished our "run" and came home. I was defeated. I was sad. And I was sweaty and I hate being sweaty! My sweet Jared kept telling me he was proud of me and when I snapped back that I didn't want him to say that because there was nothing to be proud of, he reminded me that a month ago I wouldn't have even tried. And he is so right! Just doing it is half the battle and I am doing it...and that IS something to be proud of. I am exhausted, sore, and embarrassed of how little I can actually BUT I do  feel good that I am making good choices. I know it will be really hard for awhile but I also know it will get easier. I will start to feel better in so many ways and I can't wait for that. For now, it just flat out sucks!